2 weeks down!

My goodness, the past several days have been down right exhausting! In short, the babies are doing great. The monitoring can either take 25 minutes or a few hours, and I just hate how it's a toss up. Besides the good news that they are steadily getting bigger (well, my belly sure is, so they must be) and healthy all around, I have been seizing my precious hours off the monitors and walking around with my dad and little boy. I believe I have a growth scan tomorrow to gage their weights but they should be around 2 pounds a piece.

Today is husband day, though! Yay! I only get to see him twice a week because of his busy schedule. We are going to spend the night eating food that is bad for us and watching the funny Will Ferrell movie "Step Brothers". Earlier he snuck me out to brunch al fresco in the sunny, brisk fall weather. Our little man slept through most of it. Hooray for husband day.

Wanted to share pictures from the week:

The girls are about the size of a head of cauliflower each this week.

 

tête-à-tête:

 

 

I think she looks like me. What do you think?

 

 

Lots of this:

 

 

Lots of that:

 

 

a little bit of Halloween, too:

 

 

and today, Husband Day! Glorious cornflake crusted French toast with caramel hiding underneath. His lamb burger with goat cheese and mint pesto was good too.

 

He is spoiling them already.

 

 

Little girl stuff is CUTE.



The NICU

I toured my future this morning.

The NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) was shown to me. I cannot express how sobering it was to experience it. The first child I came upon was a 29-weeker. (I'm 27 weeks). I've seen many, many pictures of preemies but it is so very different when they are right in front of you.

I've been relatively good about taking this all day by day, but I was obviously very excited to reach viability (23-24 weeks). I did alright seeing the babies that I did today, but I have to admit that if there had been a 23/24-weeker in there, I would have had to step out.

There is no denying that I feel so much more safe staying in the hospital, and that I wouldn't rather my babies be in anyone else's care once they make their grand appearance. As difficult as it was to process what I was seeing and having explained to me, looking at them, I just longed to pick them up and give them a nice cuddle. I wanted to get in that isolette and kiss the bottoms of those tee-tiny feet. The toes, oh, the toes!

In 49 days or less, my preemie ballerinas will be here. The moment they are showing a sign of true distress, or 49 days from now; whichever comes first, that is when I will deliver. It's hard to wrap my brain around it. I cannot believe there's 2 of them! I don't think I'll really believe we're being blessed with twins until I lay my eyes on them and am spending time with them.

Three different people here told me today "stay pregnant!" I'm tryinggg! Trust me, it's all I want. That, and to gain weight. I am really disappointed that I am not only not gaining how I want to, but this week I actually lost a little bit of weight. I mentioned in a different post that I met with the nutritionist here; the dietician came in today to speak with me...In my mind, dietician and nutritionist are interchangeable but by meeting the lady today, it's clear that she is with whom I needed to speak. She is putting me on Ensure drinks 2x a day as well as including high protein snacks along with my meals (& I'm still able to scribble in add-ons to my menus). Every ounce on my babies counts.

I really wanted to make this an eloquent post because the experience I had today really shook up my whole world, and no, I won't ever be the same again. But, I think if I even attempted to get in touch with the part of me that could make this the poetic post that it really does deserve, I'd spend the rest of the night crying in the shower. Instead I will leave it at what it is and share a snip-it from my NST tonight. I am so proud of these girls getting this far, playing nice-nice in there, and letting me carry them to another day. Every day counts.

One-minute video of my ponies galloping tonight (every swoosh is one of them moving) :



Sheilla is...Not a Punk Rocker.

Sheilla is not a punk rocker. But she is my favorite nurse here. She completely understands my girls' personalities and it makes being monitored so much easier and faster. When I see that she's my night nurse I am so happy because I know the NST will be over with in about 30 minutes flat. She also doesn't talk just to talk, but she talks enough that's it's not awkward. She is the only one that says they are active and doesn't mean it in a complaining and annoyed way...too many of them act like it's a bad thing that they're active. She told me tonight "It's a good thing that they're moving, I don't care if I have to stay here the whole time with my hand on one of the monitors." Because she gets it, and Baby A does NOT like to be tied down by the belts. She kicks and punches it off, but because Sheilla is awesome, she sits with me and holds it just over that baby so as to not upset her.

The past couple days were a little stressful because, well, they can't all be Sheilla. I have definitely been brought to tears a few times in the past few days. Going by other people's routine that they have set for you can be really exhausting when you are used to doing things 100 % your own way. They make me get up at 5 am to check my vitals, then 3 different people will come in at different times all before 7 am to say something to me about my day and to check my belly (for tautness?) and feet (for swelling). Then a team of doctors come in to...in essence...chitchat, but they do it in case I have questions first thing in the morning. That part is good because they are all high risk specialists, but still. Then breakfast...when it comes. Then an ultrasound. Then the NST. (both when they are ready for me). Then I try to get on with my day, but they have to check my vitals every other hour, as well as people who come into clean, get me ice water or towels, stuff like that. Then at night it starts all over again with my pm NST. On top of it I just feel really fragile in general. But the twins are doing really well which makes me so proud, and I would all of this x infinity for them to get here safely.

I don't know what I would do without my dad bringing little Lochlan over & them both hanging out with me every day. The other day he didn't bring him by until like 4:30 and I seriously felt one foot in the grave of death from boredom. My son is definitely my sidekick and I feel so lonely without him! Sometimes he can be a bit of a handful in my room here but I mean, my bed has like 80 buttons on it so I can't really blame him, he IS a baby. :)

I guess this was kind of a sad pity party post but I want to share pictures of my happy moments this weekend because they did happen :)

 

 

 

Let alone...discovering a Chipotle one block up from the hospital!!! Hehe.

 

 

Oh and this is Lochlan's new game...Mess With The Curtains....It kind of makes me cringe wondering if they've ever been laundered but he's so stinkin' cute playing hide and seek:

 

day 6

Spent the morning having hot flashes and nausea, it was just awful. My godsend was that the girls were really cooperative for the NST and it only lasted 30 minutes. But the whole time I had ice chips in my mouth, a cold pack on my chest & forehead, and was being fanned. Oof. I had a little lunch then took a two and half hour nap with my son snuggled up in the crook of my arm--the PERFECT medicine. It's pretty gloomy out today but the leaves are really starting to get vibrant, it's nice to see on my little walks.

Hehe, he is the best little teddy bear!

Conquering everything one pancake breakfast at a time

They knew what's up. Sitting here learning about how Vikings were so obsessed with buttermilk pancakes. They would use dented shields over fire to cook the pancake batter. But they used their swords to turn them over so they wound up being something like a popover-pancake-doughnut situation. There is something so innocent & familiar about enjoying doughy sweets, it is just funny to try to image these blood-thirsty beasts getting pancake crumbs in their beards.

Or maybe it's not funny, and I am just totally already going crazy in the hospital.

 

Anyway I guess you are being a sweetheart & checking into my blog to read about the twins & not diabetic Vikings. The girls look great. They are tracing really well. The ultrasounds are getting more exciting as they switch them into 4d now. Also exciting? There are 2 other ladies on the floor pregnant with MoMos! The cool thing about living in a city of 9 million people is, even if you are going through something that has a 1 in 65,000+ chance of occurring, there will still be 2 people next to you going through the same thing. I met one of them and she just had her Caesarian scheduled for next month. Getting that date penciled in is such a milestone & I am so happy for her!

 

The girls are obviously identical but I am starting to think their noses and chins might be slightly different...I don't know if it's just the angles or not though. What do you think?

 

 



"Inhale Radiance, Exhale Vitality"

...Is one of the nuggets of guided wisdom I just had whispered to me. Massage therapy comes a-knocking on my door once a week, and I am all about it. I reek of the eucalyptus-peppermint oil I chose from the selection she so gently introduced to me, ah. She offers hand treatments, neck, back, scalp massage & mini-facials. I will now look forward to Wednesdays.

Happy, happy, happy.

 

This morning my NST took a bit of time, but the nurse was able to get a good session without an ultrasound machine. Apparently tidying up my room & then taking a hot shower calmed them down enough to be traced on the monitor. I will have my nightly one in about an hour I'm guessing. They are kind of night owls so I bet we'll need to call a doctor down with the ultrasound machine to help trace them.

 

This must be how Katie Holmes felt when Tom Cruise bought her an ultrasound machine and made her use it every day. Haha! Yup. Just like Katie Holmes, guys.

Fresh air!

I have been so busy the past few days but I was finally able to take advantage of my garden pass! Until I am on continuous monitoring (weeks from now), I am allowed to go downstairs. We discovered a nice little library in the lobby. There's a café down there too that has pretty decent coffee & prosciutto-mozzarella sandwiches & thick caramel-pecan bars. There's an area in the back that is outdoors & grassy so it is a relief to get some fresh air.


My First Days in the Hospital (long post!)

 

Oof! This is the first moment I am getting to myself since I was admitted 3 days ago. Lots of blood work & shots & ultrasounds & NSTs (Non-Stress Tests). I just had my first flu shot; I was reluctant but, they give the dead virus version to pregnant women, and the antibodies my body will build pass along to the babies, so when they are born (which is Flu Season), they are covered too. I had my round of steroid shots yesterday & today, then they will probably do another round of it in a few weeks. The steroids sting like a bee but are incredibly important in helping mature the babies' lungs. Since we know they will be preemie ballerinas, taking preventative steps like that are crucial. I'm happy to get them!

I want to explain about NSTs because it is a big part of my inpatient stay. They are monitoring sessions that observe the babies' heart rates as well as whether or not I am having contractions. It is a very common test that all mommies of multiples must have done, but when you are high risk, it has to be done every day. I am currently having it done 2x a day until I am put on continuous monitoring. They are looking for one good, solid strip of 20 minutes. They are looking for a certain number of accelerations; for example, the heart rate must drop to say, 140 then in a certain amount of time go up 10 beats--this must be done a few times by both baby. Ideally, since they are looking for a 20 minute strip, this would only take 20 minutes and we'd all be on with our day. But when the monitor loses contact with the baby, the entire process has to start over. You can imagine it takes a bit of time, and is very unpredictable.

I have only been here 3 days but with the exception of once, they have actually had to bring in a bedside ultrasound machine to help locate the baby's hearts for the monitors. They have been termed "lovey dovey". Very often they put them on their separate monitors, and then the machine will start displaying the exact same number for each; in reality, it's only picking up one of their hearts. With a little help of the ultrasound machine, we discover they are actually causing trouble in the cutest way imaginable--they are in there HUGGING! Ow, my heart. I love them so much already.

The twins are very active all the time. No matter the time of day or whether or not I have just eaten. I admit it's a bit uncomfortable being poked and prodded and laying on my back while they sigh at the monitors. Yes, it would be nice to have it done in just 20 minutes. But you know what? I wouldn't trade them being active for anything in the world. When a baby is active, it means they have a really great oxygen flow in there. That's why it is so important to call your doctor if you notice decreases fetal movement; when we lose oxygen, we tighten up and don't want to move, we want to conserve our energy. Smart babies!

This is my NST belly:

 

 

Luckily, I was placed in a private room my first night & I'll be in this room until it's getting closer to baby time (which will still be private, but continuous monitoring is done on Labor & Delivery's floor. I'm in the antepartum unit currently). The room is pretty spacious & it's nice because my husband can stay over since it's private (one of the chairs converts to a bed). The other side of the floor's room views are of the river, and have faster WiFi, but none of that really matters. *secret pout*

                                                                                  I do like my room, though.

 

Outside my window I have a lot of blue sky & a rather large rock garden going on.

 

And sometimes when I'm lucky I get really cute, really sleepy visitors.

 

 

* * *

Yesterday & today I was sent upstairs to have ultrasounds done on more sophisticated machines than the portable ones they use to just check on them while I am in my room. Both of them showed they are doing great. I am about to have my nightly NST done. I have been waiting for the neonatologist to come speak with me about the risks that come along when a baby is born at each gestational week.

 

They are having me think of this:

 

If one baby starts suffering, do you want to let them die so that the other twin has a chance at a longer time in utero? 

 

To me, this is an absolute no brainer. They gave me the option of coming in between 24-28 weeks because babies are viable at 24 weeks. I chose 26 weeks because after the research I did, that is when I would feel comfortable with an emergent intervention. By being admitted, I am committed to their safety 100%. In my eyes, if one is in distress, then they are BOTH in distress, Not to mention, I have been educated about mono-mono babies and the fact is, if one baby passes, there is a high chance that you will lose the other one too. This happens because it sends a flood of nutrients to the other baby and causes the second twin to go into heart failure. At any rate...I think it is really important to talk to the neonatologist, and I am looking forward to being fully educated by a specialist in person about it further, but again, to me it is a no brainer. Thankfully, they are looking great & everyone knows the goal is try to get them to 34 weeks as planned; while this pregnancy is very unpredictable, they ARE hopeful about it.

 

I understand they have to ask it & have to discuss it because otherwise they are liable, it is just jarring. The doctor with the most experience out of the team is just like Scrubs' Dr. Bob Kelso.

 

 

But just like Bob Kelso, I am betting anything he's just like this deep down, too:

 

* * *

 

I have been meeting pretty much the whole staff. Today I met with my new nutritionist. She thinks I am gaining at the right pace but I have to politely disagree. I want to gain (healthy weight) for the girls because they are going to be preemie ballerinas. Anyway, seeing I was concerned, she gave me a 3 page long list of all the food options they offer and said I can make notes on my menu (when you stay in a hospital, you circle items off a menu each day of what you want) and they will bring it along with what I chose for the tray. I will definitely be doing this, especially since there is a fridge in my room and I can stock up so I'm not out of luck when I'm randomly hungry. But today's food wasn't too bad, among the normal stuff with Breakfast, they sent along a couple warm fresh apple crepes, and my salad they sent for my lunch was this:

 



 

But shhh, don't tell anyone who visits me because then they won't pity me and bring me awesome stuff like this cheesecake my husband brought last night:

 

Or this awesome brownie my dad brought me this afternoon:

 

My dad and baby boy keeping me company today:

 

I'm sure it's not easy on my dad taking on caring for a toddler around the clock, but he is a sweet little boy ...& is still alive so it's a step in the right direction. ;)

 

I'm off to start my NST!



Just sayin'

Hospital food sucks.

Packing day

I spent the morning picking up some groceries for the weekend & the toiletries for the hospital. Luckily I made chicken stock last night out of boredom because today is cold & rainy. Put me in the perfect mood to make some homemade chicken noodle soup.

 

Luckily I left the broth out of my son's portion.

 

 

 

I have to spend the rest of the afternoon fixing up the place, doing laundry & dishes, packing, & setting up my dad's area. He is flying in from California tonight! I am over the moon he agreed to take care of Lochlan in our home while I am away. The hospital is a short walk from here so they will be able to visit all the time. I am going to miss seeing my little one every single minute! I won't lie though, I am looking forward to a break from cleaning because with this big belly here, it is a chore in and of itself just to bend down to pick something up. I am so excited to be all packed up tonight & be so close to the next step in this crazy journey!

Busy bees

Ooooof! Really enjoying laying down lately. The girls are night owls but whenever I have a snack then curl up for a rest, they start practicing their ballet. I started feeling them move early on at 13 weeks, the same gestational time I started feeling my son's tickles. 

People say the first few times you feel a baby move feels like popcorn popping or a butterfly flapping its wings. 

It worried me so much in the beginning with the twins. It was so bittersweet. Each movement meant they were also tangling their cords. Even still it never failed to put a smile on my face. They are still able to flip, but they are running out of space in there. Watching them wriggle around during ultrasounds now actually makes me feel a bit vicariously claustrophobic. I hope they don't start feeling that way though, and stay in a full 34 weeks! I really do love each kick, punch, twirl, elbow and butt nudge. I am at the fun part where you can see and feel them moving from the outside. Last night I was cuddling with my little boy when the girls started kicking away, & he could obviously feel them. He looked up at me with such a sense of wonder in his eyes. He is too little to know what is going on but he can tell it is something special. With so much going on it is easy to detach, but it's moments like that, that bring you right down to earth & remind you how wonderful life really is. I am so blessed, and feel so special I'm getting 2 this time. Kissing all these baby toes will be the best early Christmas present I could think of...

Baby Bump Pictures (updated)

I'm updating this particular post just to show my baby bump in 6 week intervals.

 

 

6 weeks:

 



 

 

12 weeks:

 

 

 

18 weeks:

 

 

& 24 weeks:

 

 

We're getting there!...

 



Milestones

Everyone and every project has milestones. We give life meaning by acknowledging and celebrating them, for ourselves and for others. Sometimes they creep up on us solely because enough time has passed. The other times, they are approached through diligent goals that have been set. The latter is without a doubt more satisfactory for the soul, but when are you going through something that is not only difficult but wholly out of your control, the first way is entirely unavoidable. One must sit and let it happen, watching it unfold as only nature will have it. This is incredibly frustrating if you are all too aware of the situation and if you are a control freak. I'll admit to being a bit of a nut, but the past 6 months have forced me to change the way I handle and react to what I have been given, for the sake of my sanity.

To be Captain Obvious for a minute, each pregnancy has nearly endless milestones that can be pointed out (and are most commonly represented week to week by a different piece of fruit that correlates to the approximate size of the fetus). When life jumps from the fraction of the size of a grain of sand from a beach to the size of a dachshund in just 9 months, it goes without saying that a lot is at play here.

Now when it comes to an incredibly high risk multiples pregnancy, the palpable milestones more than double. When your doctor tells you at your 1st ultrasound that in all likelihood your body will involuntarily abort the fetuses because they are technically a glitch as far as pregnancy is concerned (and the body is very in tune with this fact), each new little victory is worthy of recognition and praise.

Like all expectant mothers, detecting the heart beating very early on, telling friends & family, and then getting past the first trimester are the most common reasons for celebration. Many are run of the mill: picking out names, the baby shower, shopping & buying for the child, documenting your growing body, happy stuff like that.

But which of these do you chose to plan for and follow through with, when you could lose one or both of your babies at any given moment?

What do you find in your heart to go ahead and get ready for them when every time you try, a cruel voice in your head reminds you that you might lose them, and whatever you are considering to do for them might be something you are crying your eyes out over later. Just what can you endure?

When every baby needs so many things (materially speaking), what do you buy for your children when there is a 50% chance you will have to either return it all or donate it all?

Asking yourself these questions, as all realistic MoMo mommies-to-be must, is utterly heart-wrenching. Even the most positive lot cannot avoid the reckoning. I am by nature an optimist but the situation has unreservedly taken stock in my bones.

Even though the risk is in no way minimized by me being further along, I have found an unshakeable stance of confidence in the girls now that they have reached legal fetal viability. Going inpatient is without a doubt one of my biggest milestones in this crazy rollercoaster of a pregnancy. But the past few weeks of being hyper aware of their viability, I have begun itching to shop for their things and buy for them. It doesn't help that little girl stuff can be unbearably cute. They have their fair share of neutral/borderline boyish hand-me-downs from their big brother, but there is no denying the pink and purple, the ruffles and sparkles, the tutus and hair bows.

My cousin must have tapped into my newly found readiness to finally embrace the inevitable accumulation of things for them because I just received a very thoughtful package in the mail from her & and her husband. I had planned to do a little shopping this week for them to set my nesting urges at ease, but upon opening this glorious box of polka dots and pink, I fear there is no turning back now. Ha!

Another milestone was also met at my second fetal echocardiograph this morning. Wonderful news all across the board with this one. All foreseeable holes are now closed, all arterial connections properly in place, each chamber functioning as it should. It is a very lengthy examination spending no less than 45 minutes per heart, which is hard to sit through when a) you're a worried mom and b) you're having a massive hot flash that is turning into raging nausea. Then sitting afterwards while they discuss it in an office without you. I guess that is what makes it that much sweet when 2 fetal cardiac specialists inform you at the end that every thing checks out beautifully. God is one of mercy.

My second appointment of the day today was with the OB/GYN doctors to discuss my imminent hospital stay (SUNDAY!!!). It was a relatively quick visit - and - bonus? They told me that while I may start off in a shared room, I will be moved to a private room for the duration of my stay! Hooray!

In case you were burning with desire to see a couple of outfits that were included in the lovely box from my cousin:

 

And these are the first things we bought them as Mommy & Daddy from our little trip to Chinatown yesterday (a large children's quilt that I cannot wait to see them cuddling together under & a Hello Kitty nightlight) :

 

 

And here is a little glimpse into the walls that I have become so familiar with over the past 6 months, starting with the view from my ultrasound place (same place as my maternal fetal medicine specialists & fetal echocardiograph specialists--and only 2 floors up from where I will be inpatient) :

 

 

The ultrasound room I have been in many, many times, anxious, worried, excited, & beside myself with relief:

 

 

 

And a peek inside my OB/GYN's room (the top left twin example is mono-mono), this appointment thankfully being my last thing of the day to do besides take a bath & enjoy the whole chicken, vegetables & stuffing my husband is currently roasting for our dinner :

 

 



Ultrasound Photographs

With my singleton, an unfussy 38 week long pregnancy, I had three ultrasounds the entire time. The first being to date the pregnancy and detect a heartbeat, the second was the anatomy scan, and the third one my doctor ordered to observe his weight.

Now with the twins, I have had approximately 20 ultrasounds in my 25 weeks. I have watched them grow week to week, some weeks even day to day (one time I had 4 ultrasounds in a single week!). It has been fascinating to see how fast they progress.

The only downside to very frequent ultrasounds, is that potential problems can be noted--only because it is so early or something has not quite developed; things that you would see in a normal singleton pregnancy too, if you were checking in as often. The majority of these issues mend themselves and are no longer a problem by the next time you see them. They are noted as soft or hard markers, depending on how the technician interprets it. An example would be a hard marker for down syndrome, that could be completely absent 2 weeks later. So far, I haven't had these kind of scares really, but I am reminded that it's a normal thing to experience with such close observation. (Hey, stress, can we break up already? I'm so over you.)

Now that I am further along, all the organs and what not are all in place & the girls look the way they will when they are born. They are in there just maturing and packing on some weight. The printouts that I get from the visits now are generally just one baby in each shot; a face of one baby featuring a cameo appearance of a foot or two of the other baby.

However, the early scans when they were still looking like misshapen clay alien babies, you could really see and understand exactly how they are mono-mono.

 

Spooning during the 9 week scan:

 



 

Playing patty-cake at the 11 week scan:

 

Smell my feet, treat or trick at the 17 week scan:

That Explains It

I'm starting this blog so that when I go on hospital bed rest for 2 months, my friends' Facebook feeds aren't blown up with endless "I hate hospital food, mumble, mumble."/"Won Monopoly again." status updates. And for the several hundreds of women impacted by a monoamniotic monochorionic (a.k.a. mono-mono, MoMo, or MCMA) pregnancy that lurk the internet for something to read that they can relate to other than stark medical journals.

What does it mean to have conceived monoamniotic monochorionic babies? It means you have been chosen to endure a challenge so heart-wrenching that no matter the outcome, it will alter your life dramatically.

It means you have become pregnant! Your one embryo (yes, warning, sciencey words) is on its way to doing what its been doing since the dawn of time. Cool. But in a mono-mono case, about a week or even two weeks later, that eggling decided hey, it'd be even cooler if I had someone to pass the time with in here, so I'm going to split into two people now.

In a nutshell, fraternal twins are two completely separate eggs from the get-go, and they are SOMETIMES hereditary because if a woman hyper-ovulates (releases more than one egg each cycle), this is something that can be passed onto to her daughters, and her sons can be a carrier of it to his daughters. Fraternal multiples, while a grueling pregnancy I am sure, is a fairly low-risk pregnancy unless you have other health issues going on too.

Identical multiples are not so much black and white, but shades of grey. They are not hereditary because they are in fact a spontaneous act at random with which no scientific explanation is possible. (See, it's getting interesting. Stay with me.) Many people know there are fraternal or identical twins (or triplets, etc.) but many do not understand that there are different kinds within the identical realm, too. The risk that the pregnancy will inherit is dependent on the timeframe in which the embryo (yes, sciencey words) decides to split.

Mono-mono multiples are the most rare kind to conceive aside from conjoined. A MoMo pair (or trio!) has only split once, leaving them to share the same placenta and the same sac in the womb. (Ew, sac? Womb? Sorry, there's no other way to say it.)

The risk of cord entanglement is the main reason this pregnancy is so high risk. It is inevitable and can happen at varying degrees--as well as occur at any given time. Tangles are worrisome; true knots and compression of said tangles are the real danger.

Twin-to-twin Transfusion Syndrome (TTTS) is also another possible danger that occurs about 15% of the time; in layman's terms since they are sharing a placenta, one of the twins could begin to receive less nourishment, causing the other to receive an overload of nourishment. Treatments are available if the case is mild.

If you have been diagnosed with MoMos, your doctors will be watching you very carefully with frequent ultrasounds to follow any and all of the possibilities of the aforementioned dangers. They are looking for normal progress of babies (as they would with any fetus), looking to make sure the size discrepancy between the two does not exceed 20%, the blood flow to the heart, brain, body, and most importantly--cord flow and heart rates.

But what about some tidbits with bulletpoints instead of paragraphs?

Okay.

• Mono-mono twins occur about 1 in 60,000 pregnancies. Mono-mono triplets are possible, but even more rare.

• Mono-mono twins are identical, meaning they will be the same gender

• A stat that floats around the internet therefore it must be true, is that 75% of MoMo pairs are girls (but don't stock up on pink crap just yet...plenty discover manly bits at their anatomy scans.)

• Specialists in the States strongly encourage MoMo moms-to-be to go in for an inpatient hospital stay starting between 24-28 weeks gestation up until they give birth.

• They must always be born through cesarean section. The chance of survival the natural way is extremely grim.

• Most specialists set a goal of a planned C-Section between gestational weeks 30-34. It is my understanding that after week 32, it is a bit of a gamble due to the possibility of cord compression (because there is a high chance that they are tangled). Also, the placenta begins to start to slow down, so since the two are sharing it, it may be safer to go ahead and retrieve them. As the patient, if everything is going smoothly, you DO have a say as to whether you want to take the gamble after 32 weeks or not.

My personal advice if you have just been diagnosed with a mono-mono pregnancy is to:

• Find an obstetrician that specializes in high risk pregnancies as well as multiples
• Find a maternal fetal medicine specialist (MFM)
• Make sure you are covered or at least partially covered medically by insurance
• Do not miss a single appointment or ultrasound unless an emergency arises and you need to reschedule
• Do not use Google to find the answers you need. Talk to your specialists. They have chosen an entire career towards taking care of you and educating you. Make a list of all questions so you do not forget when you see them.
• Explain the gravity of the situation to your friends and family. No one should go through this alone.
• See a nutritionist, or at the very least make sure you are getting an outrageous amount of protein in your diet. This can be accomplished even if you are a vegetarian.
• Hold off on all purchases until you are well into your second trimester/approaching your third trimester. Many MoMo families decide to hold off until the babies are safe and snug in the NICU. It is a personal choice.
• Educate yourself and then let it go. It's out of your hands. Every new doctor I've met was dying to inform me of all the risks, but once I had heard the full scope twice, from then on every new face I was introduced to was told, "Yes, I understand all the risks and I want to continue with my pregnancy. Thank you." That's all it took, they were very sweet and dropped it immediately. Once they know you are in-it to win-it they will move on to how to best take care of you.

Now that you get it, you might want to know what is my story. I'm in my 6th month of pregnancy, so let me back track. A few months after having our first born, we decided to try for another baby. My husband is a twin himself, and we figured it would be nice to have them close in age. We talked so many times about how it would be nice to have twins, an "instant family". For five months, I selfished prayed for twins every night. Once my doctor told me "You're pregnant, my love!" we both knew in our hearts it was twins.

The first month: I had one ultrasound and they couldn't really see anything because I was not that far along. Beta levels have to reach a certain amount before it is visible on a screen. Two sonogram technicians whispered to each other about seeing two things, maybe one was a baby and the other was a polyp (very small tissue growth).

The second month: I had a couple blood tests done to observe my beta levels, and they jumped sky high. This can be indicative of multiples but can also be normal for a singleton. At any rate, it meant the pregnancy was progressing in a healthy fashion. I was still unsettled from my first ultrasound (polyp??) so I brought my husband along with me. Clear as day--twins! But the technician was silent and went to fetch a doctor--never a good sign. She came in and announced they were twins, but they were sharing a placenta and a sac. She went on to say how rare it is and the chance of survival is about 50% and most doctors do not feel comfortable delivering them past 30-32 weeks. She went on to encourage me to terminate the pregnancy to save us the hardship. She left on the note of mentioning since identical twins are technically a malfunction in the development of an embryo, the body will probably miscarry them anyway. Through my tears this doctor was informed that there was no way I could discard two beating hearts. We left and it was downpouring. We spent the busride soaked and reading about the risks and stats on Wikipedia and success stories on blogs. Those success stories on blogs were what gave us hope; not the doctor. We clutched to those before and after pictures of a MoMo twins' journey from a snapshot of their NICU days to a picture of them as thriving young children. I hope to give the same peace to another couple. Without reading those posts or our families' unwavering support (hi! we love you!!), I don't know how we would have gotten through those dark, early days.

The third month: Severe nausea everyday continued to go strong. Switched to a new team of specialists. Ultrasounds showed two heart beats each time, what a relief.

The fourth month: Nausea continued. The ultrasound tech discovered Baby B has a 2 vessel umbilical cord--another rarity. Most babies have a 3 vessel cord. Baby A has the normal 3. Baby B is missing that second artery though. The main problem with lacking that artery means the baby could develop at a much lower weight. Their cords have begun to tangle. Can feel them moving around.

The fifth month: Hi, nausea. Glad you could make it. Every, single, day. The babies' cords have become so entangled in a ball, it is referred to as "a bunch of grapes". The fetal echocardiograph goes smoothly except since it is done early, they need to do another to get all the imaging they need to study the development of their hearts. They have good cord flow, and we focus on that. We discover they are GIRLS! I could feel them starting to get stronger at their ballet moves in there.

The sixth month: Nausea is not only every day, but coming in waves now even when I take my medicine. They are weighing in over a pound a piece and looking healthy. I will have my second fetal echocardiograph to get the rest of their hearts' imaging. Feeling lots of movements; others can see and feel them move from the outside. Able to discern their facial features during ultrasounds (so exciting!). Feeling so blessed to be getting this far. I will be admitted to the hospital for inpatient care around my 26 week mark, just over a week from now.

And now you have been brought up to speed...