So far so good... I am technically in the early stages of labor as I have dilated to 3cm, but have not been progressing so I am laying low in my regular room again (I had to go up and have continuous for about 5 hours, not that bad though). Still having 2 NSTS a day.
This Thursday, Thanksgiving, I will be moved to the Labor and Delivery floor and be put on continuous. I will deliver sometime between then & Saturday. Probably Saturday because last I heard, the NICU is pretty full, and since it's not technically an emergency, they'd like to make sure there is adequate room for them. That, and the holiday...it could either be very busy or very slow. They will deliver right away if there is any sign of distress, though.
I am so nervous for my caesarian I cannot even express the element of terror it strikes in my heart. It's really quite a brutal act that makes me dry heave just thinking of it. I have been pretty good about refraining from googling it, and trying to really only direct my questions and concerns to my doctors. The image of them needing to place my womb on top of my stomach to sew it up then stuff it back in me then sew me up again will forever haunt my nightmares. And probably yours, too, now!
The terrible part is they bind your arms to the table. I have not been able to get this out of my head. It is also terrible that while you are numb, you still feel everything--all the tugging and what not. You are awake. Unless it is an emergency and there is no time for the epidural, then they knock you out with gas, which is also pretty terrifying. Some women request that the curtain is not put up because they want to watch the whole thing; brave, brave women! Eep! I could never.
When something is happening that I am uncomfortable with, what makes me feel better is to look away and have a finger in my mouth to bite down on until it is over (like getting an IV put in). But I can't do that this time because I won't be able to move my arms. My tongue will probably bleed. There are very scary risks that come along with a c section, but they are rare, especially if it is a scheduled one and not even an emergency.
I am worried about making the wrong choice by taking them "early" but honestly since I have dilated on my own (and already to a 3 out of 10), I doubt I would make it to 34 weeks anyway. We are in good hands... The OBs, the pediatricians, the nurses, and of course, ultimately, in the hands of one merciful God.
I am incredibly proud to have gotten this far in the pregnancy, and will be forever thankful. We still have a long road ahead of us. The girls' soon-to-be pediatrician said he thinks they will be home in 2-3 weeks, but I am not getting my hopes up. The standard is that they will be home by their real 40 week due date (our real due date is January 23rd), any time before then is bonus. Every baby is different, but before coming home, they must be able to regulate their own body temperature, take feedings without a feeding tube and keep it down, gain weight steadily, have lack of apnea, have absence of jaundice (nearly all preemies must spend time in "tanning beds" to photosynthesize the chemical in the blood to reverse jaundice--something that usually naturally occurs when they are carried to term), breathe room air...those are the main things.
It is going to blow my mind to meet them! My family and I are so excited! Thank you to everyone who has been following along in this crazy mono-mono journey with us and sending us well wishes, prayers, and inspirational notes. And of course all the baby gifts, haha! The girls are so spoiled already. :)
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